Thursday, January 22, 2009
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
The Things I have taken for granted...
1) Hot showers- Yes, I have rarely had one here. Its not like I live in a hut or anything. I live in an apartment, have a bed, but hot water is not just a given here like it is in most places in the US. Its going to be a bit hard to get used to.
2)They don't have washers and dryers here-I am more ok with this than no hot showers but washing clothes is now a time consuming task that is no longer throw your clothes in and walk away. You actually have to attend to your clothes here- make sure there are no down-pours of rain to worry about. At times I feel like my clothes aren't actually clean but people have been washing clothes like this for hundreds of years. Much longer than any machines have been around. It is amazing how much all of us are so dependant on machines.
3)Being an only child- I begged begged begged my mom for siblings but I'm not sure if I could have done it. Maybe if they were a bit younger or a bit older but not the same age. WOW. Having a sister who is almost exactly the same age as me has proved to be difficult. What has proven to get in the way the most is language. I know enough Spanish to get along, have spoken to her several times about everything under the sun but she treats me like she is smarter than me because she knows Spanish. Yesterday I was trying to do some homework, she came into my room to chat and saw that I was working on something and asked to see it (this has not been the first time this has happened). She then proceeded to give me a Spanish 101 lesson on how to conjugate verbs in present tense. I about screamed. I wanted to ask her if she had heard me speak spanish yet. I didn't though, I sat back and let her torture me. She really really likes to mother me. Tell me how things are done here. Which is fine with somethings but with other things its a matter of opinion. For instance we went to the store so I could by some stuff for lunches (which I didn't even want to get because they have Almuerzos here for $1.50 that includes a juice, soup, meat, rice, and salad). I think I could have gotten more for my money going the with the almuerzo but they told me that it was much more economical to bring my own. I decided that I would just go along with this and buy a few little lunch items but the shit hit the fan... they told me I had to buy ham. I told them that on a regular bases I don't eat lunch meat. Plus, the ham here is totally GROSS. I don't even want to think about what parts of the pig are put into them. They continued to insist upon me buying ham.. so I did. I was so mad at myself for giving in but I felt like I had no other options but to. Now every morning my host mother says "SANDUCHE?" as we finish eating breakfast. Its more like a command than a question. So I make the damn sandwich. I usually end up giving it away or feeding it to the homeless dogs who I think need it more than me anyway.
4) MY MOMMY'S AND GRANDMA'S COOKING
FINNNNN
2)They don't have washers and dryers here-I am more ok with this than no hot showers but washing clothes is now a time consuming task that is no longer throw your clothes in and walk away. You actually have to attend to your clothes here- make sure there are no down-pours of rain to worry about. At times I feel like my clothes aren't actually clean but people have been washing clothes like this for hundreds of years. Much longer than any machines have been around. It is amazing how much all of us are so dependant on machines.
3)Being an only child- I begged begged begged my mom for siblings but I'm not sure if I could have done it. Maybe if they were a bit younger or a bit older but not the same age. WOW. Having a sister who is almost exactly the same age as me has proved to be difficult. What has proven to get in the way the most is language. I know enough Spanish to get along, have spoken to her several times about everything under the sun but she treats me like she is smarter than me because she knows Spanish. Yesterday I was trying to do some homework, she came into my room to chat and saw that I was working on something and asked to see it (this has not been the first time this has happened). She then proceeded to give me a Spanish 101 lesson on how to conjugate verbs in present tense. I about screamed. I wanted to ask her if she had heard me speak spanish yet. I didn't though, I sat back and let her torture me. She really really likes to mother me. Tell me how things are done here. Which is fine with somethings but with other things its a matter of opinion. For instance we went to the store so I could by some stuff for lunches (which I didn't even want to get because they have Almuerzos here for $1.50 that includes a juice, soup, meat, rice, and salad). I think I could have gotten more for my money going the with the almuerzo but they told me that it was much more economical to bring my own. I decided that I would just go along with this and buy a few little lunch items but the shit hit the fan... they told me I had to buy ham. I told them that on a regular bases I don't eat lunch meat. Plus, the ham here is totally GROSS. I don't even want to think about what parts of the pig are put into them. They continued to insist upon me buying ham.. so I did. I was so mad at myself for giving in but I felt like I had no other options but to. Now every morning my host mother says "SANDUCHE?" as we finish eating breakfast. Its more like a command than a question. So I make the damn sandwich. I usually end up giving it away or feeding it to the homeless dogs who I think need it more than me anyway.
4) MY MOMMY'S AND GRANDMA'S COOKING
FINNNNN
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
creepy creeperton... that's all I have to say
Last night as me and my new friends were riding to the Mariscal in a taxi we saw a girl and a guy standing together on the side walk.
I see the girl throw down here bag which looked sorta like a book bag or something like it and begin to cross the street. We thought they might be novios having a little spat but has she began to cross the street he ran after her. He then procided to grab her hair, punch her, and try to strangle her. To say the least we were all terrified and had no idea what to do. We told the taxi to stop and used one of our cell phones to call the police then all of the sudden a police car came out of no where and picked the girl up. It was so scary/weird/emotional/every terrible feeling one could have combind.
When we arrived at the Mariscal we ran into a Canadian girl who had had her bag stolen from her, was bunched in the head twice, and was threatened to have her throat slip if she didn't comply. Scary much?
I love this city but I hate it at the same time. All of this sadness can be blamed on severe poverty. People are just looking for a way to eat because they living on little to nothing here. The average wage is something like a dollar a day if they are lucky and if they can find some Gringo with anything of value they have basically hit the jackpot. The jackpot in the means of being able to feed their family, put clothing on their backs, and find some sort of shelter.
The whole situation is extremly scary and sad. I wish there could be some sort of resolution, revolution, reconciliation.. anything to leave this country in a better place.
I see the girl throw down here bag which looked sorta like a book bag or something like it and begin to cross the street. We thought they might be novios having a little spat but has she began to cross the street he ran after her. He then procided to grab her hair, punch her, and try to strangle her. To say the least we were all terrified and had no idea what to do. We told the taxi to stop and used one of our cell phones to call the police then all of the sudden a police car came out of no where and picked the girl up. It was so scary/weird/emotional/every terrible feeling one could have combind.
When we arrived at the Mariscal we ran into a Canadian girl who had had her bag stolen from her, was bunched in the head twice, and was threatened to have her throat slip if she didn't comply. Scary much?
I love this city but I hate it at the same time. All of this sadness can be blamed on severe poverty. People are just looking for a way to eat because they living on little to nothing here. The average wage is something like a dollar a day if they are lucky and if they can find some Gringo with anything of value they have basically hit the jackpot. The jackpot in the means of being able to feed their family, put clothing on their backs, and find some sort of shelter.
The whole situation is extremly scary and sad. I wish there could be some sort of resolution, revolution, reconciliation.. anything to leave this country in a better place.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Te amo, Quito
Hey all,
Sorry it has taken me so long to update you on my life. I have been internet free for about 6 days and i know this is a critical time for people to know what is up in my life.
Alright, lets start from the beginning. I was supposed to get into Quito on Wednesday night of last week. I think that was the 8th.. anyways, we couldn't fly in because there was a ton of fog.. Which is not uncommon for Quito. It is hard to see the surrounding mountains or volcanos here because there is so much fog all the time but on a clear day we are supposed to be able to see four. I wish I could tell you all the names but there are all in Chichua and hard to remember. Thus I had to fly into Guyaquil a costal city. Everyone speaks soooooooo fast there it was really hard to understand them. I didn't see much of the city but from what I could see I didn't really like it.
As many of you may know I was really scared to meet my host family but they are amazing. I live with Gladys (my host mom) and Vanessa (my host sister). I was supposed to be living with Gustavo whom on the paper said he was 25 but it turns out he is like 39 and has two kids. He lives in La Mitad del Mundo which is where the equater cross Equador. That is how Equador got it's name:) Anyways, they took me and Jose there. It was really awesome. They had an amazing exhibit about Ecuador's bugs where there is a ton of live bugs. The bugs here are not small by any means. Since we are so close to the Amazon there are a ton of gigantic beatles, spiders, butterflies, and moths. They were all really cool to look at.
Oh yeah, Jose is now staying with me and my host family. He asked me if I wouldn't mind. Its been a little tough having him here. I want to discover things on my own and its hard to when you have someone else there who is fluent in Spanish.
Gladys is really sweet, she likes to talk alot about the world, people, basically life in general. She is a painter, a mother, a realtor, a race car driver (or co-pilot as she likes to call it), and farmer. She owns a lot of property all over Ecuador and knows a lot about her country. Vanessa is a law student who is basically a all around sweet girl. I have met the whole extended family and couldn't say one bad thing about them. They are both really proud of their country and have a lot to offer me. Sometimes I feel like Gladys likes to exagerate a bit but it just adds to her character.
They live right across from CIMAS where I go to school so it is really nice that I don't have to take the bus or anything like that. My room is small but cozy. There is a really big window that over looks the volcano Pichincha.
So far school looks good. I know I'm going to learn a lot of Spanish and get to know a lot of cool people. We get to take day trips around Ecuador. It looks really interesting.
On Saturday I went out for the first time to a place called Gingolandia which basically means American land. There is a bunch of bars and places to eat. It was fun. The drinks here are way too stronge and way too cheap. For a Cuba Libre it only costs $1.50.
The next day we went to a place called Papaillarta which are a bunch of hot springs from the volcanos around here. They were beautiful. I had to wake up at 5AM to go and the elevation was really hard on me. It was also really hard to wake up cause I went out the night before but it was all worth it.
I miss you guys so much. All of you. The people that I go to school with here are not the same! Sometimes I get teary eyed looking at facebook pictures. Anyways, I love you all!
I'll post again ASAP
Sorry it has taken me so long to update you on my life. I have been internet free for about 6 days and i know this is a critical time for people to know what is up in my life.
Alright, lets start from the beginning. I was supposed to get into Quito on Wednesday night of last week. I think that was the 8th.. anyways, we couldn't fly in because there was a ton of fog.. Which is not uncommon for Quito. It is hard to see the surrounding mountains or volcanos here because there is so much fog all the time but on a clear day we are supposed to be able to see four. I wish I could tell you all the names but there are all in Chichua and hard to remember. Thus I had to fly into Guyaquil a costal city. Everyone speaks soooooooo fast there it was really hard to understand them. I didn't see much of the city but from what I could see I didn't really like it.
As many of you may know I was really scared to meet my host family but they are amazing. I live with Gladys (my host mom) and Vanessa (my host sister). I was supposed to be living with Gustavo whom on the paper said he was 25 but it turns out he is like 39 and has two kids. He lives in La Mitad del Mundo which is where the equater cross Equador. That is how Equador got it's name:) Anyways, they took me and Jose there. It was really awesome. They had an amazing exhibit about Ecuador's bugs where there is a ton of live bugs. The bugs here are not small by any means. Since we are so close to the Amazon there are a ton of gigantic beatles, spiders, butterflies, and moths. They were all really cool to look at.
Oh yeah, Jose is now staying with me and my host family. He asked me if I wouldn't mind. Its been a little tough having him here. I want to discover things on my own and its hard to when you have someone else there who is fluent in Spanish.
Gladys is really sweet, she likes to talk alot about the world, people, basically life in general. She is a painter, a mother, a realtor, a race car driver (or co-pilot as she likes to call it), and farmer. She owns a lot of property all over Ecuador and knows a lot about her country. Vanessa is a law student who is basically a all around sweet girl. I have met the whole extended family and couldn't say one bad thing about them. They are both really proud of their country and have a lot to offer me. Sometimes I feel like Gladys likes to exagerate a bit but it just adds to her character.
They live right across from CIMAS where I go to school so it is really nice that I don't have to take the bus or anything like that. My room is small but cozy. There is a really big window that over looks the volcano Pichincha.
So far school looks good. I know I'm going to learn a lot of Spanish and get to know a lot of cool people. We get to take day trips around Ecuador. It looks really interesting.
On Saturday I went out for the first time to a place called Gingolandia which basically means American land. There is a bunch of bars and places to eat. It was fun. The drinks here are way too stronge and way too cheap. For a Cuba Libre it only costs $1.50.
The next day we went to a place called Papaillarta which are a bunch of hot springs from the volcanos around here. They were beautiful. I had to wake up at 5AM to go and the elevation was really hard on me. It was also really hard to wake up cause I went out the night before but it was all worth it.
I miss you guys so much. All of you. The people that I go to school with here are not the same! Sometimes I get teary eyed looking at facebook pictures. Anyways, I love you all!
I'll post again ASAP
Thursday, January 1, 2009
new yearss?
The end of the year.. but what does that really mean? Nothing really. I’m sure when the calendar first emerged by the Aztecs there was some type of regenerating ceremony pertaining to rebirth but now I just see as a fabricated notion that was made up by Weight Watchers or some other company promising a new life.
In reality it is a new beginning for me. But this is the first time really since I think I was in third grade (when I moved to Mexico for a while) for an opportunity like this to present itself and for a completely new life to be laid out before me.
BURGESS JESSICAGladys Palau (Mother, 63 years old, house keeper)FAMILY MEMBERS:Gustavo (Son, 25 years old, student )Gladys Vanesa (Daughter , 20 years old, student )
That is my home stay information. Am I excited? Yes and no. I think anyone moving in with a new family has a bit of apprehension. I think it’s great that there is someone so close to my age that can really show me the town to the level I want to see it. I want to know what all the local college kids do and this will be a great link into their lives. But something tells me that living with a 20 year old host sister could present me with a few problems. Who really knows though, Gladys Vanesa could become the sister I never had. Haha.
I am having a bit of anxiety. I had a crazy dream about the family and everything that you could imagine went wrong. Let’s just hope that my dream doesn’t come true.
As January 7th approaches the reality of me being away for so long becomes a lot more real. I keep having second thoughts. I have talked myself out of it a few times but then know that this is something that I have to do. Something that I have wanted for a long time.
I have no idea what to expect. Lets leave it that way. Open heart open mind!
In reality it is a new beginning for me. But this is the first time really since I think I was in third grade (when I moved to Mexico for a while) for an opportunity like this to present itself and for a completely new life to be laid out before me.
BURGESS JESSICAGladys Palau (Mother, 63 years old, house keeper)FAMILY MEMBERS:Gustavo (Son, 25 years old, student )Gladys Vanesa (Daughter , 20 years old, student )
That is my home stay information. Am I excited? Yes and no. I think anyone moving in with a new family has a bit of apprehension. I think it’s great that there is someone so close to my age that can really show me the town to the level I want to see it. I want to know what all the local college kids do and this will be a great link into their lives. But something tells me that living with a 20 year old host sister could present me with a few problems. Who really knows though, Gladys Vanesa could become the sister I never had. Haha.
I am having a bit of anxiety. I had a crazy dream about the family and everything that you could imagine went wrong. Let’s just hope that my dream doesn’t come true.
As January 7th approaches the reality of me being away for so long becomes a lot more real. I keep having second thoughts. I have talked myself out of it a few times but then know that this is something that I have to do. Something that I have wanted for a long time.
I have no idea what to expect. Lets leave it that way. Open heart open mind!
Monday, December 22, 2008
Kittens and Pink EYE
Yes, somehow I recieved both. Well first I got the kitten then I got the pink eye.
I didn't think that I actually had pink eye. I woke up one morning and was like.. eww my eye feels gross and is really watery. Then I went downstairs to have my whole family basically tell me that I looked really cracked out. THANKS FAM. I think my mom said something along the lines of me attending a gong show. WOW.. where did she learn that? I definatly have never said that before to her much less my friends. I was thinking she probably picked it up from some trashy T.V. show.. haha. She never ceases to surprise me with her disgusting knowledge of teen vernacular. Anyway, throughout the whole day I was denying the fact that I actually had PE. Until we were at dinner and I became vision impaired. I seriously couldn't see much and it was a little scary. So I decided to go get eye drops. I couldn't help but wonder what the cause of this disgusting infection was. I kept thinking about the part in Knocked UP where they all get pink eye from farting in eachothers pillows. GROSS. Then I decided to google it.
Causes of Pinkeye
Pinkeye can be caused by many of the bacteria and viruses responsible for colds and other infections, — including ear infections, sinus infections, and sore throats — and by the same types of bacteria that cause the sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) chlamydia and gonorrhea.
Pinkeye also can be caused by allergies. These cases tend to happen more frequently among kids who also have other allergic conditions, such as hay fever. Some triggers of allergic conjunctivitis include grass, ragweed pollen, animal dander, and dust mites.
Sometimes a substance in the environment can irritate the eyes and cause pinkeye; for example, chemicals (such as chlorine and soaps) and air pollutants (such as smoke and fumes).
This made me feel better because I was sitting next to a really sick guy on the plane to San Fran and caught a really bad cold from him. I'm hoping I got the pink eye from him too.
Anyways, on to the kitten. One night when we were going out this sweet little kitty kitty appeared at our door. How they find a way to my grandma's home I will never know because she is the sweetest lady when it comes to animals. The little meow was the size of my hand with huge blue eyes and really pretty strawberry blonde fur. So cute. I decided to name her NOEL.. since it is Christmas. My grandma only wants to keep it until after New Years but I have a feeling she'll end up with another cat. That will make three and assure her official status as "the cat lady". Yay!
On to other news.. I had a dream that Liz flipped my car. It went something along the lines of me being over at her house (a house that looked nothing like her real house). It was out in the woods on the side of this hill/mountain thing. I parked my car in the driveway and she didn't like it so she decided to park it for me. She backed it up to the side of the hill (which was really icey because of all the snow) and couldn't stop it from slipping right on down the hill. It picked up so much speed that it flipped and to say the least I got really mad and started screaming. It was actually really funny because her mom ran out and lectured me on how rude it was that I was so upset about my car and not about if Liz and if she was ok.. The weird part about this dream is I could really see something like this happening. It was a good dream though.. I got to see everyone I miss!
I haven't had any human contact other then my family since I have been here. It's a little crazy. All friends haven't come home for vacation and I am going nuts-o.
I cannot wait for the 7th! It is coming so quick and I am so ready for it!
I didn't think that I actually had pink eye. I woke up one morning and was like.. eww my eye feels gross and is really watery. Then I went downstairs to have my whole family basically tell me that I looked really cracked out. THANKS FAM. I think my mom said something along the lines of me attending a gong show. WOW.. where did she learn that? I definatly have never said that before to her much less my friends. I was thinking she probably picked it up from some trashy T.V. show.. haha. She never ceases to surprise me with her disgusting knowledge of teen vernacular. Anyway, throughout the whole day I was denying the fact that I actually had PE. Until we were at dinner and I became vision impaired. I seriously couldn't see much and it was a little scary. So I decided to go get eye drops. I couldn't help but wonder what the cause of this disgusting infection was. I kept thinking about the part in Knocked UP where they all get pink eye from farting in eachothers pillows. GROSS. Then I decided to google it.
Causes of Pinkeye
Pinkeye can be caused by many of the bacteria and viruses responsible for colds and other infections, — including ear infections, sinus infections, and sore throats — and by the same types of bacteria that cause the sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) chlamydia and gonorrhea.
Pinkeye also can be caused by allergies. These cases tend to happen more frequently among kids who also have other allergic conditions, such as hay fever. Some triggers of allergic conjunctivitis include grass, ragweed pollen, animal dander, and dust mites.
Sometimes a substance in the environment can irritate the eyes and cause pinkeye; for example, chemicals (such as chlorine and soaps) and air pollutants (such as smoke and fumes).
This made me feel better because I was sitting next to a really sick guy on the plane to San Fran and caught a really bad cold from him. I'm hoping I got the pink eye from him too.
Anyways, on to the kitten. One night when we were going out this sweet little kitty kitty appeared at our door. How they find a way to my grandma's home I will never know because she is the sweetest lady when it comes to animals. The little meow was the size of my hand with huge blue eyes and really pretty strawberry blonde fur. So cute. I decided to name her NOEL.. since it is Christmas. My grandma only wants to keep it until after New Years but I have a feeling she'll end up with another cat. That will make three and assure her official status as "the cat lady". Yay!
On to other news.. I had a dream that Liz flipped my car. It went something along the lines of me being over at her house (a house that looked nothing like her real house). It was out in the woods on the side of this hill/mountain thing. I parked my car in the driveway and she didn't like it so she decided to park it for me. She backed it up to the side of the hill (which was really icey because of all the snow) and couldn't stop it from slipping right on down the hill. It picked up so much speed that it flipped and to say the least I got really mad and started screaming. It was actually really funny because her mom ran out and lectured me on how rude it was that I was so upset about my car and not about if Liz and if she was ok.. The weird part about this dream is I could really see something like this happening. It was a good dream though.. I got to see everyone I miss!
I haven't had any human contact other then my family since I have been here. It's a little crazy. All friends haven't come home for vacation and I am going nuts-o.
I cannot wait for the 7th! It is coming so quick and I am so ready for it!
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Dream to Sleep.
Could everyone just please take a look at what time I posted this. K, thanks. That is my problem exactly. I know I really wanted to focus on crazy ideas about revolution in Latin America and all the stuff I’m really interested in but I have a feeling that this blog is going to be a mixture of how I’m feeling, what is going in my life, and other thoughts on the world (including revolution!). I guess one could look at revolution in a number of ways…Body? Mind? Soul? and in several different contexts.
December 16: I wake up at 4:30 AM after being up until almost 2AM to go to the airport for my little San Francisco adventure. I know it is my own fault that I only got like 2 ½ hours and it was worth it because I was up with friends on one of my only nights left in Seattle. Can we just talk about my adventure? Haha- well I defiantly had a positive attitude because I got my passport and it was really easy to get around SF due to BART, their amazing public transport. When I was done there it felt like it was all a dream. Did I really just go to SF then home again in one day…not even a day a matter of hours? Yes, Yes I did.
December 17: I get to go to México! I’m excited to get out of blustery old Washington however the feeling is bittersweet. I’m surprised that I only cried once about my living. I thought I would be a total mess. Maybe it was because I was coming here and knew that I had just a bit more time before I was off living a new life in a different country. I had to wake up at I think 5AM today and actually went to bed around 12AM so a good five hours! But what I was really looking forward to was laying in my bed in Mexico and sleeping for at least 12 hours or some ungodly amount of time. Nonetheless, I forgot that this was impossible due to the fact that my lovely mother and I get to share a room. OH WHAT FUN! Sometimes I really forget how much I hate this part of my México experience. I don’t think it bothered me nearly as much when I actually lived at home but now that I have been off on my own.. Without being mothered for 3 years now it feels really weird.
Anyways, I was really sleepy last night so I got into bed and listened to my i-pod and read. It was nice. I think it was around 8 PM Seattle time that I decided that this would be the plan of the evening. I’m reading a really interesting book entitled Ivan Illich In Conversation by David Cayley. You all should pick it up.. Illich has some really interesting ideas about life. ANYWAYS, I keep drifting in and out of sleep with the sweet sound of the Avett Brothers coming in and out of my brain. Then I take my i-pod off and proceed with this whole sleeping concept.
My mental notes of the sleeping process:
1) I’m not used to how hard the pillows are and regret not bringing my own- what if there are hard pillows in Ecuador? Haha- ok I know that is like the stupidest thing I could worry about but it was really something that crossed my mind.
2) I left my shoes in Gillian’s room. What to do? I begin plotting a way for my beloveds to return to me.
3) I realize that the blinds are open and think… Oh shit I have been living in a hole for the past six months. The sun is going to wake me up. I proceed to get up and close the blinds then get back into bed.
4) Light?? Is it really morning. I look to my left and see that my mom is reading… Wow, is she really trying to read as I sleep? Oh yes she is. I ignore it. This happens several times throughout the night. I almost start feeling bad for her because she is awake as much as me and wonder why the hell she doesn’t just take a sleeping pill to knock her out.
5) I hear the rustling of the blinds… Why are they being opened? I made damn sure to close them. I know it and so does my mom because she was in the room when I closed them. I proceed to ask her what she is doing. “I want to watch the sunrise.” Well, that’s just peachy mom but could you do it somewhere else? I’m sure exactly what I said but I believe it was along the lines of “I just closed those blinds because I knew I couldn’t sleep with them open.. CLOSE THEM!” Doesn’t happen. I try to go back to sleep then I get really worked up with how much disrespect my sleep is getting. Doesn’t she understand that this is my room too? That she is sharing it with me and that I deserve the same amount of respect that she does. She just as easily could have gone downstairs on the beautiful patio and watched it there… But no, she wanted the convenience of her bed to watch the sunrise. How nice. I get up go to the bathroom and she proceeds to open her suitcase like this whole thing was no big deal. I confront her, she gives me a sleeping mask and thinks the problem is solved. What if I don’t want to sleep with a sleeping mask? I just want to sleep like a normal person does. She is not normal. No one goes on vacation and wakes up at the crack of dawn. NO ONE. Unless you are my mother. I know that my mother’s idea that she deserves more respect than me because she is the mother will not subside over this predicament. But I make a clear point (rather dramatically in my brain) to jot down in my mental notepad that when I have kids I will try to find that equal balance of respect. Where I try to understand where they are coming from instead of ruling out their feelings because I am the mother. Not to say my mom does this all the time… she is usually quite understanding, open minded, and respectful. But when it comes to sharing a room, something that she and I have not done in quite sometime it is hard for BOTH of us to find that respect.
In the end I realize that we are just trying to figure out how to live with one another again. That this may not be an easy process at first, especially because we have to share a room but it will always be a learning process! Thank God that I can come to this realization instead of being mad all morning. I think I will go running and then hit the pool. Maybe I can take a nap later on?
December 16: I wake up at 4:30 AM after being up until almost 2AM to go to the airport for my little San Francisco adventure. I know it is my own fault that I only got like 2 ½ hours and it was worth it because I was up with friends on one of my only nights left in Seattle. Can we just talk about my adventure? Haha- well I defiantly had a positive attitude because I got my passport and it was really easy to get around SF due to BART, their amazing public transport. When I was done there it felt like it was all a dream. Did I really just go to SF then home again in one day…not even a day a matter of hours? Yes, Yes I did.
December 17: I get to go to México! I’m excited to get out of blustery old Washington however the feeling is bittersweet. I’m surprised that I only cried once about my living. I thought I would be a total mess. Maybe it was because I was coming here and knew that I had just a bit more time before I was off living a new life in a different country. I had to wake up at I think 5AM today and actually went to bed around 12AM so a good five hours! But what I was really looking forward to was laying in my bed in Mexico and sleeping for at least 12 hours or some ungodly amount of time. Nonetheless, I forgot that this was impossible due to the fact that my lovely mother and I get to share a room. OH WHAT FUN! Sometimes I really forget how much I hate this part of my México experience. I don’t think it bothered me nearly as much when I actually lived at home but now that I have been off on my own.. Without being mothered for 3 years now it feels really weird.
Anyways, I was really sleepy last night so I got into bed and listened to my i-pod and read. It was nice. I think it was around 8 PM Seattle time that I decided that this would be the plan of the evening. I’m reading a really interesting book entitled Ivan Illich In Conversation by David Cayley. You all should pick it up.. Illich has some really interesting ideas about life. ANYWAYS, I keep drifting in and out of sleep with the sweet sound of the Avett Brothers coming in and out of my brain. Then I take my i-pod off and proceed with this whole sleeping concept.
My mental notes of the sleeping process:
1) I’m not used to how hard the pillows are and regret not bringing my own- what if there are hard pillows in Ecuador? Haha- ok I know that is like the stupidest thing I could worry about but it was really something that crossed my mind.
2) I left my shoes in Gillian’s room. What to do? I begin plotting a way for my beloveds to return to me.
3) I realize that the blinds are open and think… Oh shit I have been living in a hole for the past six months. The sun is going to wake me up. I proceed to get up and close the blinds then get back into bed.
4) Light?? Is it really morning. I look to my left and see that my mom is reading… Wow, is she really trying to read as I sleep? Oh yes she is. I ignore it. This happens several times throughout the night. I almost start feeling bad for her because she is awake as much as me and wonder why the hell she doesn’t just take a sleeping pill to knock her out.
5) I hear the rustling of the blinds… Why are they being opened? I made damn sure to close them. I know it and so does my mom because she was in the room when I closed them. I proceed to ask her what she is doing. “I want to watch the sunrise.” Well, that’s just peachy mom but could you do it somewhere else? I’m sure exactly what I said but I believe it was along the lines of “I just closed those blinds because I knew I couldn’t sleep with them open.. CLOSE THEM!” Doesn’t happen. I try to go back to sleep then I get really worked up with how much disrespect my sleep is getting. Doesn’t she understand that this is my room too? That she is sharing it with me and that I deserve the same amount of respect that she does. She just as easily could have gone downstairs on the beautiful patio and watched it there… But no, she wanted the convenience of her bed to watch the sunrise. How nice. I get up go to the bathroom and she proceeds to open her suitcase like this whole thing was no big deal. I confront her, she gives me a sleeping mask and thinks the problem is solved. What if I don’t want to sleep with a sleeping mask? I just want to sleep like a normal person does. She is not normal. No one goes on vacation and wakes up at the crack of dawn. NO ONE. Unless you are my mother. I know that my mother’s idea that she deserves more respect than me because she is the mother will not subside over this predicament. But I make a clear point (rather dramatically in my brain) to jot down in my mental notepad that when I have kids I will try to find that equal balance of respect. Where I try to understand where they are coming from instead of ruling out their feelings because I am the mother. Not to say my mom does this all the time… she is usually quite understanding, open minded, and respectful. But when it comes to sharing a room, something that she and I have not done in quite sometime it is hard for BOTH of us to find that respect.
In the end I realize that we are just trying to figure out how to live with one another again. That this may not be an easy process at first, especially because we have to share a room but it will always be a learning process! Thank God that I can come to this realization instead of being mad all morning. I think I will go running and then hit the pool. Maybe I can take a nap later on?
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